Thursday, July 5, 2012

We Came Out of the Closet

E and I had big plans for our reveal to our families. Our parents live out of town and we wouldn't be seeing them for at least another few weeks, so we decided Skype was the best alternative.  Sunday was my mom's birthday so we decided that would be the day!

And of course, the Derecho of 2012 struck and we were powerless - literally - for 3 days straight.  That meant, no Internet and no Skype.  We tried using "face time" on E's iPhone at a nearby Panera who had power but it wasn't working so we gave up and decided the old fashion way would have to do.  I was definitely upset.  We had planned to have my cousins and aunt and uncle who live nearby over for dinner to break the news to them too later that evening.  When my one cousin called to say they were going to have to cancel, I did everything I could to tell them we wanted them there for at least a little while if they could. I am sure she suspected something but I didn't know what else to say.  I hung up the phone and started to cry.  Our announcement to our parents was ruined, my cousin who I'm very close with wasn't going to be there, it was 100+ degrees out, I hadn't slept well and we had no power.  Not the best moment.

But I got it together and called my mom first who was visiting my sister and the baby.  She was in tears on the phone - doing that silent cry type of thing.  I was in tears, E was in tears. It was such a happy moment.  My sis was napping so my mom went to wake her up - more laughing, more tears ensued.  Then we called my dad who had a similar reaction - "the most wonderful news" he said. He mentioned that he'd been praying for us each and every day consistently since Lent. Not that he doesn't pray for us in general, but he said he specifically made sure there was a prayer said for E and I.  Well, I think between my parents and E's mom - we had some pretty heavy hitters nagging the Big Guy upstairs.  I had decided to leave the prayers up to others awhile ago.

It was such a nice birthday gift for my mom- E's family was ecstatic too!  That evening, we revealed a cake we were able to buy at the one bakery in town with power to the remainder of the family - "Sunday Dinners + 1" it said.  It's a tradition with my cousins and aunt and uncle to all have dinner on Sunday together.  I think my cousins suspected something, but the look on my aunt's face was priceless.  She was so surprised and kept saying, "oh my goodness, oh my goodness" over and over.

All of these people have stood by E and I for so long throughout this journey, it felt amazing to let them share in our joy. Everyone revealed the small hints they thought they could see over the last few weeks, but of course didn't say anything.  My 2 cousins were already fighting over who could host the shower - I'm almost in tears thinking about all of this.

Yesterday, we received our first gifts too.  WOW! This is really real. I don't have to hide the pregnancy anymore, people are giving us baby gifts...this is really happening. I am starting to feel more and more confident that things can work out.  

We caved and bought a Doppler which arrived on Monday.  After about 10 mins E was able to find the HB at about 150-160.  It was difficult  to use at first but I think E has the magic touch.  I am glad we got the Doppler, and I've resolved to use it only 1 x per week if I really need it.  I  would like to use it when my parents are in town so they can share in this excitement as they don't live close enough to attend any appointments. 

Of course, my ability to relax then will stress me out sometimes too because I feel like the minute I'm totally happy and content is when I'll get hit by an ocean liner. Ick, infertility is still there and I think always will be.

Tomorrow is our NT scan which I'm a little nervous for but I'm hoping with all my might things look OK.  Of course, we won't get the blood tests back for about another week but at least we'll be able to get part of the scan done.  Fingers cross our little plum does well tomorrow.

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