Thursday, May 31, 2012

The "S" Word

Yes, spotting.  I woke up this morning and went to the bathroom only to find a teeny twinge of pink on the TP.  FREAK OUT!  I wiped again, small amount of pink. I inserted my endometrin insert - again teeny bit of brownish pink on the applicator.  My heart sank.  I literally almost collapsed on the floor.  This was the beginning of the end the last time around.

I had another teeny spot of pink later that morning when I used the restroom at work about 9:30 am but so far nothing more thank God.  I have no cramping which is a good sign.  Last time my spotting and eventual bleeding was accompanied by mild cramps at first followed my more severe cramps.

I have to keep reminding myself that this cycle is NOT like last cycle. We have a heartbeat for goodness sake.  Much, much different than a falling first beta.  Needless to say I spent the entire day a nervous wreck. I couldn't eat much at all because my stomach was in knots.  E kept trying to reassure me, but it's tough when all you've come to expect is loss.

Tonight I feel fine, except for the nerves.  I feel totally symptom free which is annoying. Five more days till our next ultrasound.  This wait is so awful. I feel as if May was the longest month on the planet...and June just might be that way as well.  I have no way of knowing what's going on in there and I'm just trying to take it one day at a time - or even 1 hour at a time like I did today. 

Needs some prayers for an uneventful weekend.  

No comments:

Post a Comment