Thursday, May 3, 2012

Time is Slowing

Aaaack! Usually I make it to at least 5-6 days past transfer before I feel like time has slowed, but I'm only a mere 4 days past transfer. This is crazy.  Well, I've decided I'm just going to think positively about this cycle. In fact, so much so that I've allowed myself to start looking at nursery decorating ideas.  What?!?! Crazy, you say?!?! Yes, maybe a little bit, but I haven't let myself look at any beautiful baby things for years because it just brought sadness. And even though we don't have a baby just yet, I can really feel like we're getting close - whether it's through this IVF, or subsequent FETs or through adoption.  There is an end in sight. I can see it now whereas just months prior, our struggles truly seemed never ending.  I have hope again that there will be an end to this time in our lives and that end is just months, not years on the horizon. 

Yes, it's somewhat dangerous to be so optimistic, but it beats being so depressed all the time.  Besides, being pessimistic about a cycle's chances hasn't helped me previously so I thought I'd try out a new train of thought.  If this cycle is a bust, I'll be very sad no matter what - but hopeful that we're one step closer to our family building solution.

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