Monday, June 25, 2012

Announcement Freak Outs and Other Icky Stuff

I am incredibly nervous something is going to go wrong after we make our announcement.  The thought of telling my friends on Wednesday has turned from exciting to terrifying.  I am so scared that I will jinx this pregnancy by saying things out loud.  Also, I'm terrified that I won't have just had a US prior to the next appointment isn't scheduled until July 6th which seems like an eternity to me.

And then I was having a sad day on Sunday because I'm upset with myself that I can't just be happy and trust in this.  I don't want to be terrified any longer. I want to be happy and excited but it's just not coming so naturally.  I guess I continue to have good days and bad days and we'll have to make this announcement soon because I'm hibernating from friends and neighbors who invite us for drinks or want us to come jump on their brand new trampoline.  Seriously!?!?!  

I secretly hoped for an excuse to go into the doctor this week. To have one more peek before we do the big reveal.  Well, I got my wish - yay - I am pretty sure I have a yeast infection.  So uncomfortable but at least I have an appointment today for an exam and they can tell me what to use. I'm afraid to use much without the doctor telling me what's OK and what's not. 

So I'll go in today and hopefully, they'll let me see the baby too if I ask.  My new doc said I could come in to see the heartbeat whenever I wanted so I guess I could have called this week anyway, but at least now I have a legitimate and likely non-threatening excuse to come in.  

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